anonymously all of me

Category: Life on Purpose

Help! I’m Being Hunted by the Stomach Flu and I Have an Interview in 2 Days!

Well my 2nd interview is finally here. I am 2 measly days away from it after waiting almost 2 months since my first interview. And guess what? My boys have the stomach flu! I am downing Airborn like my life depends on it. Can you imagine having to cancel because I’m seriously sick? No. That WILL NOT happen. I feel like I’m being hunted down by that flu, like in The Hunger Games, and I am going to do everything I can to avoid it. If it finds me, I hope it isn’t until the day after my interview. Hell, if it hits me the moment I return home from the interview, fine, but it CANNOT prevent me from meeting up with this manager to move forward. ((Fingers crossed, holy water sprinkled, blood sacrifices made.))

Surprisingly, I’m glad the process has taken as long as it has. The time has allowed me to hone in on my self-belief. Like working out a muscle, I’m deepening my resolve. I’ve been reading 177 Mental Toughness Secrets of the World Class by Steve Siebold a lot lately to keep me in the right mindset. Like I mentioned in another post, it’s like having a like minded friend to pump me up and tell me I’m wonderful whenever I’m reading it. I need that because I feel so insecure and out there when I stop and look around. The mentality of the masses catches up with me and I think to myself that I must be crazy! But, when I read or hear from others who see the world and all it’s potential in the way that I do, I feel like I might not be that crazy after all. Maybe, just maybe, the masses are the ones who are lost.

This is a big transition for me, and when I think about how close it is, I get a nervous pit in my stomach. Like I’m standing in the airplane with my parachute on my back and I’m about to jump. I want to do it. Hell, I have to do it. But now that I’m about to do it, I’m freaking out a bit. I guess that’s what makes it great.

This is what comes from reaching for things beyond my comfort zone. Quite honestly, if it hadn’t been a stretch that would take me forward this much, I wouldn’t have gone for it. I’m not interested in wasting time with the mundane or mediocre. I’m interested in growth. In the conquering of self full expression of all that is in me.

So I’m taking today and tomorrow to polish up all that I need to know before my interview, so I can be 100% confident that I did everything in my power to get this position. And I’m going to this interview with the assurance that I’m my best self. I feel like I can be at peace with any outcome knowing I laid it all on the table and held nothing back. And when I do get this position, I’ve had the time and mental space to set intentions and plans for all the areas in my life that I want to focus on, so I will be able to leap at 100%, beginning this leg of my journey with full force.



Help! I’m Surrounded by Amateurs!

I am reading a great book by Steve Siebold called 177 Mental Toughness Secrets of the World Class. The reason this book is so great for me is not because I am learning tips and tricks from it, or being challenged to think in a new way, but rather, I am watching as he articulates the way I have come to think in my life already, and affirms my thinking as being great. Everything he writes is spot on with all that I have become. And because I used to think in what Steve would call an “amateur’s” way, I can see the difference very clearly. Steve compares the thinking of amateurs and pros, and explains why some people are successful and others aren’t.

As he compares the two, I am beginning to realize that one of the reasons I struggle is that I am surrounded by people who think like amateurs and therefore can’t understand what I’m saying when I speak out my heart. They’re coming from an entirely different perspective that I have to constantly fight against.

Recently I was discouraged for a couple days about the position I am going after because HotGuy was talking to a few of the reps who already work there and told me all they were complaining about with the company. Their complaints were nothing that worries me personally, but the negativity made me wonder if I was being foolish to not worry about it. After digesting it and finding my own truth on it, I realized where the disconnect was. Most people are looking for the path of least resistance. They want to make the most amount of money for the least amount of effort. And when they fail to be successful, it’s always because the system has a problem, not them. I’ve seen this over and over again with reps. They complain about the market being down, the product being bad, the hours being long, etc… They switch companies all the time hoping to find one that will pay well and require nothing in return. Their goal is “cruise control” in a territory. How can I get to the point where I don’t have to think or work anymore and can just relax?

I do not think that way. My goal is to devour the world. To challenge myself to my limits so that I can see how tall I really am. I am not looking to settle down and retire. I am not looking to arrive or end. I am looking to accomplish as much as possible with whatever time I have left on this earth. In fact, I turned down a position that would have paid me the same amount as the job I’m going for and been easier, because I knew I’d be bored. It wasn’t challenging enough for me. I’m not looking for a job, I’m looking for an experience. I’m looking to grow another foot and be propelled into higher and greater levels of living with every step. When I get to the point where it’s easy, I’ll be moving on to the next big thing because I’m not looking for easy. Easy is boring. I HATE being bored. In fact, I can trace almost all my depression to times when I’ve been bored.

This is why I am tackling Crossfit at the moment. It is extremely entertaining to me. Every time I go I accomplish something I haven’t before. I make sure of it. And I get a high from it. Yet, there is so much negativity at Crossfit from people who are looking to be “there” already. They can’t stand that there are things too challenging for them at the moment and they want to just fast forward to the point where they are elite athletes and can do everything perfectly. These are the people that hurt themselves doing things they’re not ready for, and walk around the gym feeling sorry for themselves or defeated after a workout. And then they quote studies saying Crossfit is bad for you, etc… Hell, I don’t even care if it’s bad for me. If it were sociably acceptable, and I had the energy after doing all that work, I’d jump around and scream from the excitement I get having achieved what I just did. I LOVE it! When Crossfit becomes easy, I’ll move onto something else.

So reading this book has been good for me because it’s like having a friend to talk to that knows where I’m coming from in life and thinks it’s the better thought process. This friend is telling me I’m going to be a champion because of my thinking. He’s telling me I’m happier and healthier than those amateurs. I need that because I’m surrounded by amateurs day in and day out who tell me otherwise. They wonder why I don’t prefer suburbia, a retirement fund, and the easy road over change, new challenges, and adventure. They make me feel like there’s something wrong or immature about my thinking and I hate it. I am in a constant internal battle trying to defend myself against their thinking. The extreme amateurs have been kicked out of my life, but those subtle ones are beginning to feel like they’re even more dangerous, as I don’t realize their thoughts are taking over my mind right away, I just go around doubting my resolve. I need to make friends in the champion quarter, but I’m discovering they’re a rare find. I’m adding it to the 5 year plan: make good friends. For now, Steve Siebold will have to do.



The Strategy Of a Woman Who Knows What She Wants

Well I contacted the manager of Company X and told her, in a very classy and professional way (if I do say so myself), that I’ve been stocking her company. Or, at least that’s what it would be called if all the research I’d done was about a single person. This manager was very pleased with what I had to say and wants to meet up with me in the beginning of June while she’s in town, then she wants to move me through a formal interview process with the higher ups toward the end of June. All great, except that I have to wait ANOTHER month before our first meeting, and then ANOTHER 3 weeks after that until I meet with the higher ups, at which time I hope to be given an offer.

This past month of waiting hasn’t been that hard because I’ve spent the time in what I would consider a very productive way. I studied every piece of literature and every film produced by this company, so that I would be prepared, not only for a second interview, but for when I get hired. I figure it will take the edge off the steep learning curve I will be thrown into. You see, I am acting in a way that assumes I will be hired if I do everything I possibly can on my end. I am willing this job into existence. Or at least, that’s what I’m telling myself. In the very least, it keeps my anxiety at bay, having something productive to do.

With another month to go before the next meeting, and everything having been studied, I was at a loss as to what else I could do to better my chances and keep my mind occupied until our next meeting. Just waiting felt like it would allow me to get stale, and somehow weaken the momentum I’ve laid out in the universe that’s pushing me into this position. What to do?

Well it came to me while I was soaking in the bath, as (with the exception of laying in bed at night) all good ideas do. The next thing I need to study, is me. My experiences, stories, and concrete details, like how much of a commission rate I was earning at such and such company. Having not been in the workplace for over a year (due to the baby), I have forgotten a lot of this information. Add to this the fact that my resume is “embellished” to expand my experience, and there is a serious deficiency. I can’t believe I didn’t think of this before. This could have been an epic fail!

I decided to treat my resume like a script containing the character I want the company to see me as. I will analyze it. Create a series of background stories (based on real events, mine or otherwise) to represent different circumstances. Research and memorize all the accounts that were in my territory, as well as the names of key people who work there. Research and remember all the products I have represented. And have all my numbers straight. That way, there is never a moment while being interviewed that I am stumped. Where my “embellishments” will seem embellished, or my intelligence be brought into question. I will play this roll like an academy award winning actress. Why? Because I know I can do this job, and getting in the door is all I need. Once in, I can implement my plan to become the best rep in the company within 5 years, and prove that I am amazing.

This is a completely different mentality than I’ve ever had before in my life. I’ve always wanted big things before, but until now, I’ve never been willing to do what it takes to have those big things. This research is going to require a lot of time and energy. It will be something I will have to put some serious thought into. But it could very well be the difference between stepping into my dreams, or sitting on the couch wishing they would happen.

I AM going to get this job, and I AM going to have what I want. I don’t say that in a spoiled way, like a little girl stomping her foot, but in a tone wrought with conviction and drive. I have decided to live a life on purpose, and this is the first step. I have to believe that anything is possible if I am willing to do what it takes to get it. And I am doing what it takes.